Senior Year...Wait, Seriously?!

18 days and counting until I start my senior year of college. Now I know it sounds all cheesy, but I'm not kidding, the time has flown by. As much complaining as I've done about never-ending classes, papers, and sleepless nights, I'm already nostalgic for those "golden years of college". This is mostly due to the fact that, though I have yet to start this last year, I am faced with the obnoxiously haunting question:

"So what do you want to do with the rest of your life?"

Ah, the joy I feel when asked this. My typical go-to answer has been, until now, as follows:

"Well, I would like to be a book editor who specializes in historical fiction."

Simple. Clear. Focused. This ambitious answer blew away the high school crowd, most of whom were still deliberating majors. My goals were perfectly set: good grades, college, newspaper editor, internship, more good grades, graduate early.

But then, just when I was getting content with my state of blissful naivety- BAM! A 40-ton truck called awareness smacked me head over feet. My perfect plan ended there.

So here I am, frantically raking through my past answers, looking for solutions to particulars like-

Do I go to grad school or straight to a job?

Where do I move, since California holds slim to none jobs in my market?

Will I even get a decent job in such a competitive field?

What in the world was I thinking???

For a chronic planner like myself, this state of the unknown pretty much drives me insane.

But, God...I love those two words. Over and over in my life, I've been catapulted into the unknown of life, forced to rely on His strength because mine is useless in those times. Impossible obstacles present themselves, BUT GOD has provided. And He has shown me to accept this passage:

"So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself."- Matthew 6:34

So I will not worry. I will revel in this final year in an amazing Christian atmosphere, pursuing the majors and spending time with people I love. I will enjoy each day for it's opportunity to see what God has in store for me. And knowing Him, it will turn out even better than I could have imagined.

Time Machine

Today I went to an awards ceremony for my brother's 7th grade class. Two hours of kids going up and down the stage, accepting awards for everything from academic excellence to Mr. Physical Education went from cute to exhausting pretty darn fast. The best part, of course, was seeing Harrison get his award. In between, Angry Birds and I were in a fierce battle of life and death (those pigs just DON'T die!). Nonetheless, the time did give me a chance to reflect on my own middle school experience, and I've discovered a few things:

- Guys and girls are SO different at that age, it's hilarious. The girls belt out shrill screams for each other on every award, while the guys don't say a peep and run off the stage like their butt's on fire. Ironically, I feel like this hasn't changed much.
- Seeing a student's parents gives you a REALLY good understanding of why they are the why they are. Apples certainly do not fall far from the tree- for both the good and the bad.
- Seeing the happiness they have that the year is over and they have absolutely nothing to worry about for 3 months made me, well, a bit jealous! In a couple years, summer jobs and AP work will abolish those carefree, childhood summers. Their position of complete dependence on parents and worry-free times are almost over, so I pray they enjoy this period of their life instead of dying to grow up too soon.
- With all that said, I've realized that there is NO WAY I would ever want to repeat those years!! As much as I loved my 7th and 8th grade years, the awkward crushes, changing bodies, zits galore, and slow, torturous climb to adulthood is definitely not something I'd care to do again. :)

There ya have it! Now I realize I'm literally the WORST blogger ever, with a track record about as consistent as a two-year-old's attention span, and for that I apologize. Hopefully, summer, FB exporting, and pure guilt will give me the push I need.

Until next time...Me.

Mission: So, So Possible

There are 6 days, 11 hours, and 30 minutes before I officially start Christmas break.

Approximately 26 days of break.

Goal: Read 6 books during said break.

Actually, not just any 6 books. But the 6 books I have bought and been dying to read since school started at the beginning of September.

Plan of Action:

1) Finish "The Master and Margarita".

2) Read "Lineage of Grace".

3) Re-read "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows".

4) Read "Gone with the Wind".

5) Read "Mere Christianity".

6) FINALLY! Read "The Red Queen".

This gives me about 4.3 days to read each book. Considering I do want to also have a life, my plan is to read each one in 2-3 days. Wish me luck, fellow bookworms!

5 Things I Love About My Roommate!

God has blessed me in a wonderful and unique way with my roommate this year. Yvonne is not only a roommate, she is there to help me physically- but most of all she is an amazing friend. Hence, I'm dedicating a post solely to 5 of the many things I love about her!

1) She has an awesome taste in music, movies, books, food, and friends. So much of what we talk about is that much more fun because she is super smart and knowledgable.

2) She makes me laugh all the time- literally. In her own words: "If we don't stop laughing, we're gonna grow a six-pack on our face!"

3) She is pretty much up for anything. You will find no complaining, rigid, negative bone in her. Rather, she exudes openness, flexibility, and just the right amount of spontaneity. Midnight Taco Bell or doughnuts anyone?

4) She is one of the few people I know who are truly and honestly caring about others. She means her "How are you?"s and is always open to listen, cry with you, and help in any way- even when she thinks you're having a seizure. ;)

5) Simply, she is a living example of how Christ wants us to live. She is by no means perfect (sorry to burst your bubble everyone!), but she loves God with all her heart and it shows in her life.

Before I go back to my usual avoidance of mushy gushy nice stuff, I just wanted to say love you Yvonne! You are epically amazing. :)

Christmas Traditions: The Weird, Wacky, and Wonderful

Last Saturday, my mom, brother, and I decorated the house. This is probably my favorite part of the season- the magic of Christmas just beginning as we once again unload our precious Christmas memories. Then for the whole month, I get to enjoy what we created!

This night of unveiling has its own set of traditions, little things I wouldn't miss for the world. And this time I recorded some of them to be preserved and remembered forever. Some of them include:

-The most obvious putting up the magnificent tree. Every year my mom tries to convince us to get a fake tree, which is easier to handle. Only amidst threats of running away from home do I get my real tree- dropping needles and all. ;)

-Another tradition is putting up the absolute best ornament we own- my preschool tie-dyed coffee filter. I know you're now jealous, but I'm sorry it's one of a kind!

-Our actual best decoration is probably the stockings. Each one is custom to our personality and I love them.

-To finish off a hard-working day, we make grilled cheese sandwiches, drink Martinelli's apple cider, and watch an epic Christmas movie under the lights of our new tree. Can the holiday season possibly get any better?

Happy Christmas, everyone! I pray that it will be as warm and memorable as my anticipation of this fantastic season! :)

They ♥ Them

I'm starting to realize that 90% of people absolutely love to talk about one thing: themselves.

Whether on the phone or in person, when someone is talking to you- listen! Do not text someone else, do not work on papers, do not look mindlessly around the room. If someone just spent 2 hours listening to everything that's happening to you, now it's your turn. Sadly, this is not the case. Now that it's not all about them, they suddenly develop a chronic case of ADD.

My spiritual gift is encouragement, and I love to use it. It makes my day when I can cheer up someone's day. My love language is quality time, and I love nothing more than the one-on-one time I get with people. But sometimes it's me that needs the quality time and encouragement. Please remember that before you spend an hour talking about your boy problems and hang up before even asking how my day is going. Try talking to your cat next time, they don't talk back.

Sorry for the dripping sarcasm, and this post is not about one person in particular, I swear. It's just that lately I've noticed a trend and it's getting to point where I don't want to care. My prayer is that I will continue to encourage despite opposition and frustration.

Toland and Religion Today

One topic of every class I have taken that has stuck in my head above the rest because of its clear-cut position in terms of an often complex and confusing subject- religion. John Toland’s Christianity not Mysterious is an amazing, direct look into the face of religious people in authority and their manipulation of the Scriptures to fit their specific sect’s desires. As someone who believes that many denominations today- both unknowingly and consciously- still make the same falsehoods and assertions about the Christian faith, this text is universal and should be learned by any who profess to be Christian.

“There is nothing that men make a greater noise about, in our time especially, than what they generally profess least to understand.” This quote starts off the first chapter of Toland’s book, and I think it defines the essence of what he is trying to make his readers think about. People love to talk about what they say that will never be able to be understood, because then their assertions can never be found wrong. He states that the religious authorities try to take reason out of all faith, so that no one person can contemplate and understand Christ without the help of those in charge. Although this is somewhat harder in today’s world to accomplish because of so many widespread and easily accessible resources, some still try to conform those they lead to simply believe without thinking about it with the mind that God blessed them with.

“The worst on’t is, they are not all of a mind. If you be orthodox to those, you are a heretic to these.” This quote struck me as the most relevant to the present state of the church. We are just as disjointed and at odds as they were back in Toland’s day. If you are a Catholic, then the Protestants are wrong in their traditions and beliefs. If you are Baptist, then you are to believe that Catholics are heretical. So depending on where you attend church (or mass or service) that day, you will be expected to hold to a specific set of beliefs that the others will condemn. Toland points out the hypocrisy in this mentality, and I must agree- we are all Christians and need to treat each other as such.

“…They were as injudicious, violent, and factious as other men…they were of the same nature and make with ourselves; and that we know of no privilege above us bestowed upon them by Heaven, except priority of birth.” Toland comments on the fact that those put in positions of authority are just as human as the rest of us, and therefore are just as susceptible to sin and faults as anyone else. Many fail to see this, including those in high positions, and depend too heavily on a flawed man instead of coming up with their own conclusions. He asserts that they have no other advantages except for better economic status, and we are responsible for our faith. This can somewhat be true in the present day. Although many religious leaders do not come from priority births any longer, people still do raise them on a moral pedestal that they should not be put on. The only flawless person to walk the Earth was Christ himself, and followers should always remember this fact Toland brings up.

Toland goes on to describe a few more examples of why we should utilize reason as Christians, and ultimately ends with this conclusion: “There is nothing in the Gospel contrary to reason, nor above it; and that no Christian doctrine can be properly called a mystery”. Whether or not you completely agree with his theory, it is a great topic to think about as followers of Christ. Why did God give us reason, if not to use it? But if we only have reason, where is there room for faith? Personally, I think one should possess both. Always use your mind when pondering God’s word, but in full knowledge that we will never fully grasp His glory with our finite reason. Never complacently accept things at face value, but also leave room for God’s mystery to work in your life.